"I Suffered Depression": Former Real Madrid Player Reveals
The Brazilian defender Danilo da Silva, currently with Juventus of Turin in the Italian Serie A, confessed in a talk with The Players' Tribune that he suffered from depression after signing with Real Madrid for a price of around 33 million dollars and being labeled as "the most expensive defender ever signed."
Danilo, 31, joined Real Madrid in 2015 from Porto with high expectations. However, his first season was not the best, and he only played 31 games in total. After failing to fit into the plans of Rafael Benítez and Zinedine Zidane, the Real Madrid board decided to sell him to Manchester City, where he spent only two seasons.
"During that first season, I suffered from depression. I was lost, I felt useless, on the field I couldn't make a pass of more than 5 meters, it was as if I couldn't move. My passion for football disappeared, and I saw no way out. I wanted to go back to my home in Brazil and never play again," Danilo revealed.
In the two seasons he spent at Real Madrid, the Brazilian defender won the LaLiga title in the 2016-17 season under Zinedine Zidane, finishing with 93 points, three more than Barcelona. He also won two Champions Leagues, a UEFA Super Cup, and a Club World Cup.
Danilo revealed that it was precisely in that season (2016/17) when he "hit rock bottom" and questioned whether to continue playing football. It all came down to a mistake in a match against Alavés.
Real Madrid faced Alavés at Mendizorroza on October 29, 2016, in a match that seemed like "a piece of cake" for the Madrid team. However, it was a mistake by Danilo that forced Zinedine Zidane's team to make an extra effort to come back. Although the match ended 1-4 in favor of the Chamartín team, the Brazilian defender took it as a personal defeat.
"Theo Hernández stole the ball from me and crossed for Deyverson to score. We won 4-1, but it was a mistake that cannot be made at Real Madrid. I will never forget coming home that night and not being able to sleep. I wrote in my notebook: 'I think it's time to leave football.' I was 24 years old!" Danilo noted.
The Brazilian defender also pointed out that he never told anyone in the Real Madrid dressing room about his battle with depression. However, his compatriot Casemiro tried to help him on various occasions to get through it, and he did not overcome his internal struggle until he saw a psychologist.
"I didn't tell anyone what I was feeling. Casemiro tried to help me, but I 'swallowed the frog,' as they say. And it got bigger and bigger. But after a few months of suffering, I started seeing a psychologist, and he really saved my career. The most important lesson he taught me was to see the game through the eyes of a child again," revealed the current Juventus defender, emphasizing that mental health is a very important issue.
Currently, Danilo has been defending the colors of the Vecchia Signora since 2019, with 197 appearances and nine goals.